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2-0 to the Arsenal

So fourth round here we come following the 2-0 win against Oxford, BBC match report is here. I missed the game 'cos boar stopped play. We went to Bowland Wild Boar Park, Chipping and I think Obelix reached the place first 'cos a boar was not spotted (didn't see any traces of roasted boar so he must have taken them back to gaul with him). Quite a nice walk with areas showing a light dusting of snow, much to Cal's delight. Mind you it was parky, in the Wallaby pen they were shagging to keep warm (Monst told Callum that the big Wallaby was pretending to be a blanket which had me laughing like a drain), there were a few shorthorn cattle, very shaggy and hairy, the odd pig, deer and sheep. Even better there was an honesty box for you to pay your way in, so we duly posted our four quid before wandering around and for the hour we were there we had the place to ourselves. In terms of the scenery it was stunning, I'm rapidly falling in love with the 'Forest of Bowland'.

Shiny sink

Er...well this 'ere flylady thing involves a shiny sink and bleach, well that all worked out OK and I now have a clean kitchen as I waited for the bleach to do it's stuff. I lived in a flat in Portrush with a couple of guys when I was a student and Chris one of them was a bleach freak. When we moved in we had a dark green worktop, by the time we moved out it was light green. Chris had trained as a priest but dropped out six months before his final vows, I swear the fella was trying to bleach his soul clean. Lovely fella, though.

Cleaning, Cleaning, Cleaning

As ever the house is a bit of a pit, but now Cal's up and as I know Monst ain't working I can get on with a bit of cleaning. Now I don't do tidy, eveyone at work'll tell you that but I do clean this place regularly, weird or what. Maybe that should be a post new years resolution, try and tidy work as well as home. Came across Flylady housework for the terminally challenged, that sounds like me. Gonna sign up and see what happens! I doubt it'll make any difference to home but it's got to be worth a go. Turn me into a housewife or what, now where did I put my pinny......

Civilisation and Guns

Apparently Christmas and New Year sees an upturn in violent crime. Peace and Goodwill to all men should be translated as 'Die you ********'. Well we've noticed we have a burgeoning gun and gang culture in the UK. Why do people need blank or replica weapons? Surrogate penis I guess. I'm increasingly of the opinion that size should be displayed, a quick tatoo in inches and a metric conversion for those that work that way, it'd save loads of time at meetings at work, solve a load of aggression. Please note on the Big Car Small Dick theory my first car was a Fiat 126, mind you I'm convinced the picture that link goes to was created by a running photographer rather than a dazzling display on the part of the car. Living with the Fiat 126 might be worth a read if you have any interest in the vehicular conveyance as opposed to the anatonomical link between volume of vehicle and yer bits. Mine was red and called Geraldine after my mate Al and I still have loads of affection for her as a car. England did well today at the test (cricket), 218 for 2 and 217 ahead, has the world gone mad?

It wasn't me, honest

Good news, I ain't obese 'cos I drink beer, eat too much and don't get enough exercise, no I'm ill, Obesity virus claim by US researcher, what a relief, I'm a fat bastard because I got a virus, bugger why am I so sceptical about this? Just about to put the mockers on the cricket, but I've been listening to it on Five Live Sports Extra through Freeview on the TV, and the Australian's sound rattled. What better sound can there be on the planet (other than the sound of tears of frustration of a Spurs fan as they realise just how bad they are). Sod it, I need coffee, so off to the kettle. What's more I deserve it having done Fade the Blog outside work hours.

Circs Nil - Gooner Librarian 2

Can't sleep so bit of time for reflection on yesterday. Grey lit we hit the ton, over 50% being e-grey lit so that was quite satisfying. Got a rough price on the back of a non-existent fag packet for Joe too, just need to write it up formally for him and hopefully we're laughing. Adam seems up for it. Wapped out Mo's circ abstracts too. Ages since Ive done 'em but it all came flooding back. Then pm felt down again. Is this a weekly downer, sure I felt low on Friday last week. On the way home nipped in too Toys-R-Us to start looking at Cal's birthday present, the plan is to buy him some more lego, but the key thing is to get stuff with more wheels. Not much doing. Then began a saga as I went in search of some Lea and Perrins White Wine and Black Pepper five minute marinade, Asda supplied Worcester Sauce and Pitta bread, Tesco's salad and mushrooms, while there I bumped into Mrs. Easthope, Cal's teacher. She was quite chatty which was quite nice. Then finally found what I was after in Sainsbury's. Then home, five minutes marinading, quick cook of some saffro rice and it was chinken, rice, mushroom and salad in pitta followed by cheesecake. Third round of the cup today. Arsenal take on the might of Oxford at Highbury. Sending neutral vibes for safety..... Planning on taking Callum to Bowland Wild Boar Park, Chipping, where they have Wild Boar, Longhorn Cows and Deer in this scenic Ribble Valley Park. The mobile'll keep me up to date on events at Highbury.

Decs Come Down

Family removal of decs in the end so they won't bother us again. An evening in front of BBC4, repeat of Private Schulz a series I remember not being allowed to watch as a kid. Can't see why other than the time it was screened. Then the film of the Odean gig of Ziggy Stardust tour. Must admit I'm not a fan but it was worth seeing him in his pomp. Unfortunately it was on to Rod the Mod and I draw the line at Rod Stewart so then something about Beverley Allit. I still do good trade in the Allit enquiry. Decs went up to the loft and as ever I think in the loft out of sheer panic (anything but think about what I'm doing in the loft) must run the idea of Liz buying into Cairs past her. We could flog her an entry point and database, charge a smidge for maintenance, buy in a primary license or two and sort it that way. Cheapest way for her to hit NHSnet and ultimately the Internet. The least I can do is float the idea.

Grey Lit List Greens

Fortnightly we produce a grey lit bulletin of new stuff we've catalogued, sometimes it's a pain, sometimes it's a doddle. This time, given that we've been out on bank holidays for 3 of the ten days, had 2 leave days from me thrown in we are dead chuffed to have catalogued 98 items, hopefully tomorrow will bring a couple extra to bring it up to the round ton. Looked at a grey lit collection that the Workforce Development Confederation want cataloguing today, took Tracy with me to confirm my proposed timescale wasn't overly optimistic. Reckon there's about six months work so now to the back of a fag packet bit of costing the service, specifying what we'll do for 'em and all that gubbins. God bless Joe McArdle for thinking of us, he's a little star. It'll be a little more towards next years budget and meeting the aims of resolution 2. Plan on taking the decorations down tonight, apparently Cal was objecting to the notion earlier so may have to ask Monst to take him to bed so we can get it done. See Christmas it's nothing but a pain.

Billy Elliot

I've got Billy Elliot on at the moment, soundtrack is excellent and it reminds me what a bunch of ***** (fill in yer own favoured expletive) the police were during the miners strike of 1984-1985, I remember the scum at Didcot power station with the flying pickets, it got a bit hairy then. Margaret Thatcher, I still can't think of the woman without getting angry.

Arsenal 3 - Chelsea 2

A reasonable result to see in the new year 3-2 against Chelsea means that at least I won't get the piss taken out of me by Graham from Cairs (Cairs Total Library is the Library Management system we employ at Fade). He's a Chelsea fan so next time he's up I can dish it out! If you want to find out about Cairs a trip here'll do the job. Total Library the product I work with is ideal for the special library environment. We have a web version running on NHSnet and are looking to run a copy on the web at some point soon. The great thing about it compared with Heritage IV or Alice it has the flexibility to allow me to design my own databases, thus we have a bespoke NHS Circulars database and Records Management database and the support is excellent. Heritage seems to be the main system used by the health library's of the region, increasingly endorsed by the Health Care Libraries Unit and it's a great turnkey system, out of the box, a quick bit of setting up and your away, but then you're stuck. You get the catalogue your given and can do bugger all to change it or add to it. Likewise Alice. That's fine if you want a trad library and have the imagination of a hake but it ain't us. As for the Fade thing, we've sent the email renaming us so hopefully that'll appease HCLU. Can't remember if I've ever explained this but people were getting confused between us when we were called NWHLIS (North West Health Library and Information Service) and HCLU (Health Care Libraries Unit Nort West). The Fade is a bit of a piss poor joke about the North West Grey Literature Service we provide in that we 'Fade to Grey' (check out your Visage) and taking that it became Frequently Accessing Documents that are Esoteric, which pretty much sums up what we do with either white or grey lit.

Miracle on New Years Eve

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Miracle on New Years Eve: IT Helpdesk Whinge

Don't know why I forgot to mention this, some 3 months after we bought a network printer, our IT helpdesk got round to installing it. Wonders will never cease. Now I know we aren't a major priority and that things that are vital to the NHS should take some sort of priority but 3 months, it's just ludicrous, a sloth with a limp would be quicker.

Teddy Sheringham is a ....

Came across this in relation to Teddy Sheringham on the Xylophone @ Limmy.com click on it 5 times as Arseblog so sensibly suggest for a description of the man from Shite Hart Lane or anyone else who has upset your day, week, month, year, life marginally. Still laughing like a drain at it - mind you it ain't polite. Limmy.com itself is worth a look, it's an odd Glaswegian take on life, quite arty, sometimes evil and funny. I don't do dance music but the link to the Psychedelic Furs won me over and some of the playthings are just funny.

Happy New Year

Got round to upgrading to Blogger Pro so taking advantage of the future posts to wish people a happy new year, just in case I get boring and go to bed before the appointed hour. Anyway I'm off to prepare for resolution No. 5 with a bottle of Young's double Chocolate Stout mmmmmmmmm! And 'cos I can't count or do dates despite my degree in history it didn't work so screw it, I need a beer.

New Year's on the Way so its Time for New years Resolutions

So it's time for new years resolutions; 1) To do some course work 2) To get enough dosh in for library to survive 3) To finish the 48-91 gap 4) To be fitter by 2004 than I am in 2003 5) To drink more beer...... 6) Never to 'Sport with Mrs. Fitzsimmons' Enough? Anyway below is my dysfunctional care bear self.....
Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla Kinda harsh I thought...................

HM 57's

Er...cos I deal with the things daily it dawned on me that HM(57)58 will mean absolutely nothing to most people. Roughly translated it is Hospital Memoranda 1957 and the 58th one published that year. NHS circulars all have series titles. Why this interest in the '48-'91 gap? well our catalogue begins around 91 but we hold the things back to 48, so if you ask me for a circular by number in that gap it's fine, I can find it and deliver it, if you don't have the number I have to search the odd printed index and curse a little. Now here's the rub, although 1948 is a long way away in NHS terms, some of the circulars issued are still in force, and occaisionally we get a tragedy like Alder Hey where people need to know what regulation was current at the time of the alleged problem, so the things can be pretty useful. Combine this with the fact the Tooting branch of the mafia have voted hospital filing systems the best place to hide a stiff 'cos no bugger'd find it and you can see why we hold the collection vaguely dear to our hearts (when we don't describe it with colourful expletives that is). Add to that the fact Marie needs to throw away some of her circulars but needs to know what we hold so she can do so safely and you get the beginnings of a co-operative cataloguing effort. Fling Liz from Salford and Kathy from Manchester into the equation and it really gets interesting......

Cataloguing HM 57's

A day of catching up on circs, we're trying to close the 1948-1991 gap with the help of Marie Ford at St helen's and a gaggle of receptionists who've been typing for England. Some classy stuff like HM(57)58 NHS Salaries and Conditions of Service of Laundry Managers, I don't know why but the scene when Toad is dressed as a lundress in 'Wind in the Willows' keeps popping into my head, very unfair we must still have laundry managers or were they all contracted out as part of 'Working for Patients' Maggie Thatcher's nightmare for the NHS.

Just come across Planet PDF's blog for all things pdf related. Now those who've use the library I work in will no full well that I'm a pdf lover and use acrobat to produce current awareness e-documents relating to grey literature, new stock, NHS circulars etc. I like it because it's a safe no mess option for me as a producer of documents.

Caught up on my grey lit cataloguing today at work. Need to have our next bulletin ready by Friday. So far we're a third of the way there which ain't bad going considering it has only been today that we've hit the cataloguing. Quite a relaxing day, apparently as a department in Hamilton House we had more people in than most, three of us. Had the odd suggestion put to me that Franny Jeffers dived yesterday, to which I can honestly do an Arsene Wenger, 'I didn't see it' mind you I did hear it but that don't count. Pan hang food today, baked potato and salad stuff left from Christmas. Maybe a beer later, need to tidy the living room a bit, it's covered in Cals chocolate cake crumbs. Other than that planning an early night.

Finally got round to shelling out to lose the banner ads on our serious blog Fade the Blog, we can now reveal it's existence to the PCT's etc without complaints that it's advertising middle eastern porn etc. Still too mean to lose them here. Looking at Blooger Pro is it worth having?

And the winner is Ricky Gervais by a point. Both look bloody knackered and it must have taken some guts to put yourself up as an idiot like that.

Lost the blue away strip bits tonight, mucking around with the template to get it right. I'm watching 'The Fight' at the moment, now I don't usually like boxing, strikes me a stupid thing to be invoilved with but if I'm totally honest there is something quite satisfying about Mr. Anthea Turner getting involved in a fight, and Ricky Gervais, well he's ex-UCL so I guess that's OK, not that I really liked the place much. Plus I like the Office so he gets my vote that way. Equally the David Brent character he plays needs a bloody good kicking so it'll be vaguely interesting to see him in the ring. Weirdly I have vaguely enjoyed boxing on the radio in the past.... mind you that's probably 'cos it's abstract and I don't know enough about the thing to realise what they're wittering about, it isn't real somehow.

I have a bizarre relationship going on with religous history, I find it fascinating and ludicrous, the notion that anyone would fight over something as daft as total immersion at baptism as opposed to a quickly drawn cross on the forhead always strikes me a blatently stupid. However having a sick sense of humour I love the illogical rationalisations employed by religous sects of all persuasions but especially those of the early modern world. Anyway have a browse at ExLibris which provides researchers with a variety of textual and bibliographical information both through these pages and by links to other Web sites. At the moment, ExLibris surveys bibliographical materials concerning English dissenters who were active prior to the English civil war and during the Interregnum. It's a truly fascinating period full of great characters and blatantly stupid names like Praisegod Barebones.

1-1 at full time so no one has to do any skulking at work tomorrow. Feeling sorry for the poxy pixie, he's been out in the rain all day, still I guess that's what he exists for. The drive to take Monst to work was as a result foul. Cal had hiccups on the the journey to Fazakerley and when asked what would cure them he decalared 'chocolate cake' so that's what he's eating. Now my preferred method is the method passed to me by my paternal grandmother Elsie, a teaspoon of sugar and vinegar, but hell if chocolate cake works for Cal he's a lucky little devil.

PS the Jeffers thing is purely based on his Everton pedigree, I'd play him every time against Everton or Liverpool if only to wind them up.

30 minutes to go before Arsenal take on Liverpool at Highbury, a game that decides how quickly I scurry around in work tomorrow. An Arsenal win and I can take my time if I need to wander around the building, a Liverpool win and I go into hiding. According to the Radio we've dropped Jeffers in favour of Kanu, would rather see Jeffers have a start and take it from there, but then what do I know!

Discovered today at the play barn that Cal goes for older women, he spent his time chasing or being chased by a couple of older girls, he thought it was great, I thought it was great because it meant I could drink coffee and read 'Night Watch'. He needed to expend some energy but I think he's used too much because he's currently kipping on the couch. On the plus side it means I can get the kitchen cleaned, on the downside it means that tonight he'll be wired and'll want repeated screenings of 'Dumbo'. Now I have issues with Disney and if I was anywhere near the freezer that Walt currently freezing in I'd switch it off and defrost the bugger. To my mind there are two types of Disney cartoon, thin Disney, where the animation is thin, spiky and the baddies are really just pure evil e.g. 101 Dalmations and then there is fat Disney, where the animation, characterisation are just plain corpulent e.g. Winnie the Pooh. The former I can cope with but the latter leaves me cold and 'Dumbo' is fat. Anyway better clean the kitchen while the going's good.

Bottle of 'Dirty Dicks' and some bread and cheese, can't be bad. We've hit the stage of using up the bits and pieces we bought for Christmas. Anyway as we're off to the Isle of Man so I guess I'd better find out about it. All I know off the top of my head is that they have one of the if not the oldest parliament in the Tynwald, it was a viking hang out, the little people are regularly addressed, the TT happens there and that Helen a friend of ours has a Manx fiancee Boo who works the boats. I guess www.isle-of-man.com would make a reasonable starting point and as we're flying (I hate flying so stand by for panic as the time comes nearer) the Airport would be sensible too. Just in case I want to know the news Isle of Man online makes sense too.